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15 August 2012 @ 07:35 pm
because the abortion post is apparently going to be linked in some additional places, I thought I would give a bit more info for the uninitiated.

That post was written for my journal, for my friends, who already know me and have been with me for years. So there are things in it that may be confusing if you don't know me.

Patrick - is my husband of 11 yrs. Patrick is the best person I have ever met, and he has my back no matter what.

Previous abortion - I had a medication abortion (methotrexate/misoprostol - it was before RU-486 was approved) about 12 years ago.

IF - infertility. I went through seven years of infertility. Three of my children were conceived via IVF.

Religion - I am not, in fact, an adherent of the church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I am actually Jewish. I belong to a socially-active conservative (conservative Judaism, not politically conservative) shul.

My/my husband's birth control use - is frankly not anyone else's business. The only reason anyone (other than possibly my close friends) wants to know about it is to judge us based on it, and I think that entire concept is outrageous. For complete strangers to act as though they have some sort of moral right to demand details and render judgments on how my husband and I choose to have sex is the epitome of chutzpah. Everyone can stay out of our bedroom. Additionally, I don't need any birth control suggestions. As an adult woman who does not live under a rock, I am aware of all the kinds of birth control there are.

(some said this explanation seemed "defensive". It's not. It's a principled stand. I don't think women should have to explain and justify their BC use - ever, but particularly not in the context of an abortion. It's my right to have an abortion because it's my body at issue, not because/if I met someone else's standard of birth control use (or whatever other standard). So I'm not going to get into my BC choices/opinions. I don't want to tacitly encourage that kind of judgment.)
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